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Author Topic: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!  (Read 123756 times)
J. M. Pescado
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #300 on: 2007 August 11, 04:29:41 »
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Eh, one dead arthropod is the same as any other.
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #301 on: 2007 August 11, 09:10:22 »
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yeech!!  Dead moth carcasses.  They must have tasted nice, if you kept eating them. Not that I'm volunteering to try <gag>

I'm told it was a one time event while my mother was busy talking on the phone, and the moth dust and crushed moth corpse in my hand got me busted.

I do like shrimp, maybe they taste the same. I don't remember. Tongue
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #302 on: 2007 August 11, 14:09:17 »
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The old testament forbids eating of shrimp and insects.
You are going to HELL!
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J. M. Pescado
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #303 on: 2007 August 11, 14:26:28 »
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I thought it stated you could eat locusts.
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #304 on: 2007 August 11, 15:51:58 »
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The good book is not exactly consistent.
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #305 on: 2007 August 11, 16:20:45 »
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Locust Stir Fry

by Tom Parker Bowles
from Market Kitchen

    * Servings: 2
    * Level of difficulty: Easy
    * Preparation Time: 5 minutes
    * Cooking Time: 5 minutes

Ingredients

    * 1 tbsp vegetable oil
    * 2 Shallots
    * 85g bean sprouts
    * 3 jalapeņo chillies
    * 50g pak choi
    * 20g locusts
    * splash Fish Sauce
    * 2 garlic cloves, sliced

Method

1. Heat the oil in a wok over a high heat. Add the chopped shallots and fry until soft.
2. Add the rest of the vegetables and the locusts to the wok and fry until cooked, stirring continuously.
3. Add the fish sauce and sliced garlic. Stir fry for a moment longer and season with salt and pepper. Serve immediately
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msalwaysright
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #306 on: 2007 August 11, 19:01:24 »
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Quote
The good book is not exactly consistent.

'Emerson once said, "A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds."

Or, in plainer english, even though it's probably safer not to, sometimes you just have to eat bugs.
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #307 on: 2007 August 12, 21:19:57 »
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Definitely a cultural thing. I ate locusts, grilled, years ago, and they are one of the tastier food I've ever eaten: quite similar to shrimps or other crustaceans, minus the fishy part.
I can't force mystelf to try raw or living insects, though, or larvae; but I find disgusting and therefore impossible to eat also oysters, so it makes sense.
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #308 on: 2007 August 13, 04:24:44 »
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Not that kind of locust, guys.  Kiss
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #309 on: 2007 August 13, 05:46:28 »
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I find shellfish nasty, too.

Then again, I wouldn't eat moth carcasses these days, so who knows if my tastes will change one day? LOL
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #310 on: 2007 August 17, 18:16:28 »
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I'm not quite sure when this thread turned into talking about cooking bugs   Shocked  ... but

Anyway, not that anyone noticed but I was offline for 3 entire weeks, because the cable company is full of fucktards, and I missed all the judging 'til now. Too funny! And I'm super happy that a couple of my submissions were winners. I suppose it's statistical though, because I did submit a crapload of crappy stories. Now, where's the permanent crappy stories thread? I Suppose I'll go poke around.  Smiley
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #311 on: 2007 August 17, 20:49:42 »
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she started it !!<points to Lorelei>

Actually I prefer to talk about stupidass stories over dicussing bugs.  Submit another story, maybe that will kick things off again.
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #312 on: 2007 August 26, 01:33:46 »
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I need to find the person responsible for the term "woohoo" and kick them in the face.

Nevertheless, this is a brilliant thread.
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #313 on: 2007 August 28, 17:33:27 »
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I need to find the person responsible for the term "woohoo" and kick them in the face.

Why? Makes sense to me, they couldn't use the word sex without a mature rating being slapped on and it makes plenty of sense.
"guess what hun? You get sex tonight!" "WOOHOO!"
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #314 on: 2007 August 29, 05:27:09 »
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"I don't know about that,' said the poet. 'Scorpions sound unpoetic to me. Wild honey and locusts seem more appropriate, according to the standard poetic instructions, although I've never really developed the taste for insects.'
'I've always understood that the kind of locust people ate in wildernesses was the fruit of a kind of tree,' said Conina. 'Father always said it was quite tasty.'
'Not insects?' said Creosote.
'I don't think so.'
The Seriph nodded at Rincewind. 'You might as well finish them up, then,' he said. 'Nasty crunchy things, I couldn't see the point.'"

 Wink
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #315 on: 2007 August 29, 20:06:15 »
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she started it !!<points to Lorelei>

Clearly, that post will live in infamy.

LOL

Actually, I think the locust confusion stems from the use of the word, in translations, in both "honey and" and "plague of." I doubt people would complain if they were suddenly surrounded by thousands of trees bearing tasty fruit.
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #316 on: 2007 September 01, 02:24:40 »
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Because no one else has stepped in to fill the bad stories gap: The Baca Family

No ZOMG RAPE INCEST TWINS!!!1111!!!, but it does include the line "Oh my dad died when i was tree"
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Aggie
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #317 on: 2007 September 01, 05:38:11 »
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No ZOMG RAPE INCEST TWINS!!!1111!!!, but it does include the line "Oh my dad died when i was tree"

Makes me wonder if her mom died when she was bush.  Lips sealed
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #318 on: 2007 September 01, 07:36:00 »
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Is it just me or does that girls mom have wings?  Huh

It drives me nuts that these writers can't seem to figure out how to tell a story if it isn't entirely dialog.


And thanks for getting us going again rosenshyne  Grin
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #319 on: 2007 September 01, 11:17:50 »
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Just when we thought it was safe to go back in this thread. Wink
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #320 on: 2007 September 01, 16:04:30 »
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I like how the ugh . . . fariy mom-thing freaks with the mear mention of a boy. Cuz you know, when I mention one of my guy friends my mom always tells me that she won't be raising any of my teen-babies.  Huh

The emo girl was the icing on the cake, but then again, I would want to cut myself too if my mom did that to me.  Grin
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #321 on: 2007 September 01, 17:58:31 »
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"oh and sorry about that grammer" AUGH! Don't apologise; fix it! You asshole!
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #322 on: 2007 September 01, 18:51:20 »
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Holy shit!
Every single page of this story is a winner!  Features:
-Obvious 12ness!
-Spelling "him" as "hem" consistently!
-"b4", "a$$", "y", "c" and an emotie!
-Rape!
-OMG lesbians!
-Partially unpainted ugly mansion!
-Walls down photos with plumbobs!
-Suicide?
-Inconsistent punctuation and capitalization!
-will Kina and Pamela have adopt a babi or get married>>>Huh\
-May make your brain melt!
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #323 on: 2007 September 01, 19:19:21 »
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Quote from: The Baca Family
Conner~ Umm what your number?
Kaylee~ Oh its 444-789-9024 * this is not a real number so don`t call it *

I dare someone to call it.
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Re: Jul "More Awful Than You": Most Offensive Story Or Movie!
« Reply #324 on: 2007 September 01, 20:51:01 »
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You're right Invisigoth, every page was a winner!

Quote
Tune in next time to c if
Jonasha's dad finds her,
if Tommy and Jonasha will forgive eachother and becum a cuple
will Kina and Pamela have adopt a babi or get married>>>Huh\
and if Jonasha will change her hole style into a cheer chick wit long blonde hair like her mom>?

Yeah, sometimes I change my hole style too... trimmed, shaved, hairy-as-a-hippie.... so many choices...


Quote from: The Baca Family
Conner~ Umm what your number?
Kaylee~ Oh its 444-789-9024 * this is not a real number so don`t call it *
I dare someone to call it.

Very tempting....
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