Yeah, but Kofi isn't a self-important little snot rag. Perhaps that has something to do with it.

Yeah, Jez is yeah, right. Yeah, he's definitely umm... sorry where was I again?

Sadly, that is actually how I talk. I tend to trail off, or get distracted by something shiny, and kinda forget I am mid-sentence. It makes for some cracking anecdotes, which y'all can hear later at SKYPE PARTY, WOOP.

Ah, classic shouty voleism right there. Shouldn't you be off screwing your step son or something, Malvole-io?

Yeah, of course it was a joke. And I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Way to backpedal, creepy vole.

Right, well Moryrie is definitely not getting an invite to my Calculus Céilidh. Jes, you bring the algebra, I will provide long division and cwunts is on punch duty. A rollicking good time will be had by all.

It are meme, cwunts. Plus, the image isn't showing up for me.

But you do get to flip a coin, jezzer. That's a whole world of fun by itself.

It is too late now, but IDC. TITS OR GTFO.

May I just say, I lol every time I see your name, Cunty. I am not sure yet whether it is a good lol, or a bad lol yet though.

Ok, I was willing to make allowances at first, because I was in a good mood and all, but you've made no effort to fix your sloppy typing. If anything, it's even worse than before! Abuse of clauses, lack of capitalisation, atrocities like "thru", none of it is helping your cause. It just makes you look like a complete tard.

Ok, I just about got through the first couple of sentences, but then the TL;DR and comma abuse assaulted my mental faculties and I had to remove to my safe space. Plz to be using some grammar and maybe, controversially, some paragraphs and get back to us.

Yeah, but don't forget you're also buying a whole lotta smug for those extra bucks. I can sit there, in a hip coffee shop and feel smug about my egg. Can yooooooou? Negativo. Notice also how I can use words like hip without looking like a moron. That's because I have a Mac. Instant cool irony points. Now, please excuse me for a minute, I must go and order a skinny mocha latte frappachino and fair trade cinnamon muffin to pose next to my Mac. Sadly there is no app for that... yet. Laters, droogs.

Sorry, whut? Rohina is the one crapping on the 'serious threads?' You're the one unhelpfully fangurling about Mac when it's not relevant to the topic in hand.

FINE MUM. GOD. I'M DOING IT NOW, OK? HAPPY NOW? HAPPY? YOU'VE RUINED MY LIFE.


Self fulfilling prophesy much?

Is that twice our collective age, or twice our individual ages? I would help you out, but I am too busy being felt up behind the bike sheds, and drinking White Lightning in the park on a Saturday afternoon.

You may not have asked for a grammar lesson, but you clearly need one. Actually, I've just noticed my new favourite part of your original post: 'help would be grateful'. Grateful for what, exactly? The fact that you are deigning us with your presence? LOL. UR WORDS. DEY NOT MEAN WOT U FINK DEY MEAN.

Is it Influx of Stupid day today or something? MOAR GRAMMAR, LESS IDIOCY, PLEASE.

MY FAVOURITEST SONG EVAR. FYCL.

Bey Bey, is thatchoooo?

I'm sorry, but as a child of the 90's, my attention span just doesn't cope well with tealdeer. Please to be using paragraphs and maybe even some (controversial idea coming up) PUNCTUATION and you might get a response.

OMFGWTFSTFUDIAF Seriously, STOP POSTING. You are fast becoming the tard du jour. Piss off and take your shite grammar and irritating smilies with you.

Dude, let's not try and use words we clearly don't understand. What is per-say, exactly? You clearly thought you were being a master of rhetoric, which is pretty amusing. Now, why don't you go and jump off a cliff, per-chance. 

Also, what is with the cutesy r-tard? What an F**** cunt.

*sooze adblocks Rainbowbrite's annoying sig. Where do you think we are, boolprop?

Last time I went to my local beach, it was markedly lacking in palm trees. Have I been ripped off? Should there have been palms? Is there someone I can write to regarding this problem?